Health, Kids, life.. The last 5 months

We have been kind of blissfully in our own world the last few months.. Kalli finished her first her in school with a bang! She ended up bringing home every bug the school had within a few week period. We spent the better part of the week after school having our house sanitized from floor to roof. We managed to somehow inherit a ton of her classmates drawings and creations and we also had a ton of sugar ants from Kalli leaving her bag of candy on the floor . June was the start of the summer shuffle . We had every family member we could think of come and visit . We had cook outs and we had fun in the sprinkler . We went to the splash park and we also ate out and enjoyed the rather mild temps outside.  Kason had his surgery to replace the tube that had fallen out last fall and Kaleb had surgery to take out his adenoids , also they inserted tubes.  I also lost a early pregnancy .. It was hard and well for me I was a little shocked and heartbroken. I had a very faint positive on my birthday and by the 26th I knew something was wrong. It took 4 days to stop cramping and a week to get back to normal..  While my hubby thinks it was a bad test, I have never experienced something as painful like those cramps since I had Kaleb.

June was about the same as May since we caught a summer cold.

July began with a 4th of July party and having fireworks . We loved spending time with friends and family. July also brought answers to our lives. My husband and I have both been struggling with health issues. We got news that shattered our world , but then again brought us hope. My husband was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes. He had been loosing weight and looking very pale and unhealthy to say the most. At first they where thinking type 2, but when they noticed that oral medication was not working, they did more tests and found that his pancreas was not producing any insulin at all. Once they started an insulin called Lantus, we started to notice a big difference in him. He gained back weight and also felt like he had more energy.
August was just as eventful and hectic, doctors visits and getting ready for school. Amongst all the
commotion my father had a heart attack and my mom had to go back and forth to Dallas to visit my
grandmother who was ailing and getting ready to pass. We again had a house full of people and enjoyed visiting with each one. I had a scare when I ate shellfish and ended up in the ER . I will write more about my food allergy/ health issues later. Kalli started back to first grade and had an excellent first week back!!

While much  more happened than that,  those where the things that impacted us the most...
Until next time!!

When your the forgotten, your really the remembered.

 I am going to be honest with you, I was never a celebrity writer ( has 20,000 followers) . I have always felt like I am writing to air. I am one of those invisible moms. I am that woman you pass in the store and think looks like she has more problems than a pop stars scandal. I have always looked at life like it was one big book. I think the most annoying part of it is  that out of all that work, no one will likely read it.  Here I mindlessly write the thoughts on my mind, hoping that one day I will have something left behind that will leave my children to be proud of. I tried in so many aspects of my life to be popular, from singing ( I'm surprised they don't run me out of church service) to art ( yea mere blobs and sketches). I was never the talented one, I am surprised I didn't knock over the entire line of ballerinas during many of my fruitless dance recitals. I fear that there is this new generation un talented who feel useless . The ones that feel like we are just there and watch as others gain a sort of fame . My search for acceptance and being "somebody"  was when I sang my little heart out for practice at school and had to miss the talent show because I had strep. It was trying to have someone pick me at school during dodge ball.  It was trying to buy all the cool clothes in school and listen to the pop stars which have since disappeared or have more issues than they can count. I have had people used me as a rug and walk on me , laughed at me and done things to me that would be cruel and unusual and would be short of a law suit these days. Back then it was acceptable to throw things at a classmate, or throw water on the floor so that they would slip. I have had a person treat me like I was nothing and hurt me and take the one light that still was shining at a tender age. Those things seem so distant, maybe they should so that the scorching pain won't hurt so bad. As a mom I hope I never want my children to feel that kind of loneliness and pain. I hope they are successful and become the top of their expertise. I hope to be the mother of someone who despite had a rough start will be the biggest blessing to millions and remember where he/she came from.

I tried to keep a diary with me of all the prayers I wrote so that maybe I could let someone know how to get through these things. I wrote those prayers with tears. Years ago a woman took those from me and ripped them in front of my face and told me I would never make anything of myself. I had hope I would prove her wrong and after one failed relationship that ended me up as a teen mom, I wasn't getting far fast. I met a man and fell in love, but it wasn't for me. He was gone and never talked to me. I met another and he was just not my type.. I focused on my sweet child , and made her life my priority. Then one night another person walked into my life. My eyes started to focus a little. It's almost like being nearsighted and looking out and not being able to see clearly. I had another child and he fell ill and again I feel like my words, talents and anything I did was the right thing. So here I was thinking maybe I could write like I used to. I tried and still am. 

The thing is fame isn't for everyone , some of the greatest people in the world are not discovered until they have been gone for awhile. The beauty of things are often so fast to come and go. I think Steve Jobs  had it right. He kept fighting and now is the legacy of the very thing I am typing on. I think many of the pop stars and the people that gave their lives to better others where not famous. Instead they where a work of art. So rare and so unique that no one noticed them until their flame had been blown out.  So here is to all the misfits out there that feel like we are nothing to this world of short fame and fortune. We are the lights that God leaves here just so they can get a glimpse of his biggest plan. I thank all those who told me I couldn't do it. I think being a mother of three says I accomplished something. I am married and have a huge and wonderful family, both here and in spirit!! 

By the grace and love of God, I'll be his legacy... Forget the 20,000 followers!!!

It beginning to feel a lot like Christmas?

Normally I am in full swing by now and have music on with Christmas carols and the feeling of joy and happiness in my heart.. This year has been a little harder to get that way since the first cold snap hit Abilene last week dumping sleet and ice on us, moving my parents in the house in said ice and sleet , cooking a meal fit for 12 and only having 7 eat, and going out with the grumpiest people on earth on Black Friday and making it out with half of what we needed! I am just now getting the tree up and my ideal setup would have involved some sort of easy transition into the insanity of sparkling bulbs and tinsel. This year it is moving in boxes and boxes of stuff that makes me loathe the ideal of EVER moving again. My husband seems to think that it is fun filled moving to a new neighborhood and then trying to find my way around the city I have grown to love over the last two years I have lived here! I think that people do what they have to do in order to get by and mine is getting black trash bags and filling them full of clothes to donate and toys to give to the church so that they will have more things that babies can drool on and have fun with. In my head I am imagining a table with a red tablecloth and a house full of laughter and happiness that will start in less than three weeks as Christmas will come and go like the other Holidays this year!! My reality may be the screaming of kids fighting over the red spoon that my youngest uses on a daily basis and the sounds of war coming from my bedroom while the husband plays another round of Call of Duty .... 

This week I will start the festivities by digging out every imaginable decoration and smile as my  house fills with the scent of Cinnamon and the house is decorated with everything to help my spirits . Next will be the trip to the Abilene moms premier/ my favorite things party and then onto the parade of lights!! Hopefully by the end of those things I'll be right where I need to be. No my house will not look like the newest edition of Better Homes and Gardens, but one can only dram of the dreamy look of a fireplace lit with stockings and garland on every imaginable surface in the house. 

The Real Thanksgiving : What media and Black Friday has done to the once giving holiday.

So I am sitting here watching TV and noticing the amount of Black Friday ads. Its sad that we have went from a country of sitting down with family and enjoying the bounty's of the year, to now a shopping spree to buy a new 60in Smart LED TV half the price it was before. We have went from giving to a whole bunch of Scrooges!!  As a child ( probably 7) I remember the smell of the turkey and the laughter of my family as the kids played in the backyard. I remember the prayer of thanks we said to God and the closeness we had. The last Thanksgiving  I had with my grandmother was 3 years ago, the last one with my Family was 5 years ago. I have lost touch with most of my family... Most of it is differences, some of it is being too busy. I long for the Days Santa was in December and that we had to wait for the best sales to happen on Black Friday.  I wish the old days would come back for a few days so that my children can feel the same way I did. I cant wait to see the countless news stories of people running to get the TV that they wanted and end up getting in the mess of push and shove. I cant wait for the news that consumers are still not quite getting bottom dollar on these early sales only to find out they could have bought it for twenty dollars less a week later.. I cant wait to do my last minute shopping just like my mom did and still be able to make my daughter and sons Christmas just as special. I am going to stay home hugging my children and enjoy the Parade and sip my coffee and then focus on the next big day....

Moving and The Holidays

I am so glad to be done with the apartments from the 8th ring of Hades!!!! While Most times I am grateful that I have a place to live but the level of privacy was slim to none.. The staff there until the very end was rude and awful to my family.. I am so glad to moved and into a house! We are now the proud renters of a 1,600 sq ft house.. I am so ready for the holidays and ready to start anew.. The only complaint I have is that the traffic makes it hard to get places in a hurry.. I am so glad to have a Yard and trees as the other place was a concrete prison.. I was given a place that I could move around a breath... Now I can sit and read the Dallas Morning news, Abilene Reporter news and my Facebook with full view of a beautiful yard and the kids playing.. I somewhat hope that we can get snow this year so I can stare out the window at that. The Holidays are approaching fast and I am planning Thanksgiving dinner ( even though my Kitchen is no where near unpacked or ready)  and Christmas!!! I am dreaming of a house filled with warmth as my family ( the hubby and kids, my parents and my FIL and his friend will be here). I think I am looking forward to trying to Hide the gifts from the kids so that they wont eve have a clue of what we are doing..  The hubs is trying his best to Make his shop Happen and well since we had more stuff than we thought we are having to move it around and get it started.. I know we are going to the Parade again this year and we are going to dress more warm than the last year because it got down right chilly. I am ready to play Christmas music and decorate the house with all the lights and smells of the holidays. It doesnt seem real that 2013 is almost over. I am glad however to ring in another year and another chance to live life the way the Lord wants me to. So here is to moving , the holidays and the new year!!!

What Lurks after dark in abilene?

I have stated to many times that I believe Abilene has a history that outlives itself.  Many people tell stories about the Grace and Pine St. shootout.. I wonder if there is really a history that replays itself !! I loved listening to ghost stories as a kid and I was always the curious one out of the group.. As a kid my dad used to tell me " there is no such thing as ghosts."  After a few experiences I was pretty sure.. After I grew up I became more and more a skeptic... Things just didn't spook me anymore and I was able to sit there and laugh at people swearing up and down somewhere was haunted.. I did all the usual silly little haunts ad stuff while I was a teenager in Dallas.. Now that I moved out here it is no joke that even my own apartment has its guests.. I have sworn up and down that there is no such thing as ghosts until I moved into this place. So what really lurks after dark here .. So this October I have decided to go to the Ghost tours in Buffalo Gap and Haunted Abilene!!  I am going to find a way to find the truth.. maybe prove them all wrong with a picture of something unexplained!! Hey you never know!!!

Fall Season, Sick kids, school & Moving

I have been off the computer a lot because between packing, sick kids on here watching movies, and getting some sleep. I have loathed the idea of moving and the fact if I don't get help it will be me alone moving boxes and furniture down the steep and otherwise dangerous traps of death I call stairs.  I have been in the haze of 6 am wake ups and cleaning up after three very healthy ( minus the cold and tummy flu) kids. Honestly I love this time of year, to me it is a kind of death of the year.. I mean are we really 94 days away from New Years?  I think of it as if it started crappy it might as well end with a bang.. Mine is going to end with brown boxes and new neighbors!!! I am honestly scared to death about moving again. What kind of neighborhood will I live in and what will it be like at night? Will I be able to sip coffee in the mornings and listen to the endless chirping of birds and look at snow out my window? 

Kalli is doing so well in school so far and they have an attitude scale ( or "behavior scale") where they can give them a 5 for being good or a 0 where you will get to meet the lady they call the principal.  I have had my ups and downs with it all including the bus incident and the issues with her sitting down in the bus.. I think I would rather take her to school and watch her go into the room. She has gotten so far in spelling and honestly I think I love her teacher!! I hope that they will approve my transfer for her and we wont have to change schools.

The boys are trying to help me pack... well i guess pack and unpack... Kason has had his usual two steps ahead and two steps back health issues with foods and allergens..  It has been a roller coster ride with him the last few months but with him geting the hang of asking, I think we will be just fine.. I have kept all the allergens out and brought in tons of safe foods since his office visit.. Kaleb is Kaleb... He throws fits and then becomes cuddly and then the world is fine again... He has grown so much and can say over 50 words.. My favorite is " you Baby!!"

Well time for me to go , Coffee is getting cold!!